Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house? Of course, a house doesn’t jump at all.
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Question: What’s the difference between a girl and a knife?
Answer: A KNIFE HAS A POINT.
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Doctor: “I’m sorry but you suffer from a terminal illness and have only 10 to live.”
Patient: “What do you mean, 10? 10 what? Months? Weeks?!”
Doctor: “Nine.”
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Girls are the Most Wonderful Creatures In the World….!!!! ♥
Though You Find Dem Difficult Enough
because….
If You Kiss Her. You Are not a Gentleman..!! :/
& If You Don’t. You Are Not A Man :/
If You Praise Her. She Thinks You Are Lying..!!
& If You Don’t. You Are Good For Nothing
If You Agree To All Her Likes.You Are A Wimp !! 😐
& If You Don’t. You Are Not Understanding
If You Visit Her Often… She Thinks You Are Boring !!
& If You Don’t. She Accuses You Of Double-Crossing
If You Are Well Dressed… She Says You Are A Playboy !! :<
& If You Don’t… You Are A Dull Boy
If You Are Jealous… She Says Itz Bad..!! :
& If You Don’t… She Thinks You Don’t Luv Her
If You Attempt Doing Romance. She Says You Didn’t Respect Her:l
& If You Don’t… She Thinks You Don’t Like Her
If You Are A Minute Late… She Complains It’s Hard To Wait !!: I
& If She Is Late… She Says that’s A Girl’s Way
If You Visit Another Man. You’re Not Putting In “Quality time” !!:^
& If She Is Visited By Another Woman… “Oh It’s Natural, We are Girls”
If You Kiss Her Once In a While… She Professes You Are Cold :/
& If You Kiss Her often… She Yells that You Are Taking Advantage
If You Fail To Help Her In Crossing the Street… You Lack Ethics
& If You Do… She Thinks It’s Just One Of Men Tactics For Seduction
If You Stare At Another Woman. She Accuses You Of Flirting 😐
& If She Is Stared By Other Men. She Says that they Are Just Admiring :/
If You Talk… She Wants You To Listen
& If You Listen… She Wants You To Talk
–> In Short:
So Simple… Yet So Complex !!!
So Weak… Yet So Powerful !!!
So Confusing… Yet So Desirable !!
So Damning. Yet So Wonderful
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Wife: I have a good news and a bad news.
Husband: I m very busy. Just give me the good news.
Wife: the airbags in our new AUDI worked perfectly fine.
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Question: What is the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman?
Anser: Snowballs.
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Wishful thinking
I’m looking for a bank loan which can perform two things.
give me a Loan and then leave me Alone. :-p
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Mother: “How was school today, Patrick?”
Patrick: “It was very great mum! Today we made explosives!”
Mother: “Ooh, they do very fancy stuff with you these days. And what will you do at school tomorrow?”
Patrick: “What school?”
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Conversation on WhatsApp.
He: Typing
She: replies…I already have a
boyfriend: don’t type…
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Fact: Scientists have now discovered how women keep their secrets. They do so within groups of 40.
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The Irony:
Single male selfie: 12 Likes
Single female selfie: 300 likes
His couple post: 300 likes
Her couple post: 12 likes.
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To Our ladies
My wife’s cooking is so bad we usually pray after our food.
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The Most difficult task for girls
A successful man is the one who makes more money than his wife can spend
A successful woman is the one who can find such a man
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Police officer: “Can you identify yourself, sir?”
The driver pulls out his mirror and says: “Yes, it’s me.”
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Funny, but true
Things in Boys room Before marriage:
Perfumes
Love letters
Laptops
Cards
Samsung / I-phone
After marriage:
Painkillers
Loan papers
Unpaid bills
Nokia 1100
#AfricanBro
To be continued…
